Paternity Test Reveals Jeffrey Epstein Is Chelsea Clinton’s Bio Dad

Well, here’s a twist in the Clinton Body Count, and one that Hillary Clinton will surely want to bury! You won’t find this on any of the MSM reports, that’s for sure.

A source close to Michael Hunt who is the best friend of the cousin of an intern at the Maury Povich show has confirmed that Chelsea Clinton’s biological father is none other than Jeffrey Epstein.

Mike Hunt says:

Well, it looks like Bill Clinton isn’t the only one who looked for a little strange in that marriage. Apparently Chelsea Clinton isn’t actually his daughter after all. Hillary had an affair with Epstein in the 1960s, back when she was still kind of hot. Surprise!

Well, well, well. There it is. In black and white. No denying it now.

Unfortunately, since Hillary killed Epstein in cold blood, Maury will be unable to air the show as planned. However, producer Billy Bumpkus promises to create a clip for YouTube where the talk show host will say his catchphrase, “Epstein, you ARE the father.”

There is no official word on how Bill Clinton is taking the news. However, sources not close to the Clintons at all say he has ordered a box of cigars. We all know what that means.

We expect Killary will respond to our request no earlier than 12 hours after the publishing of this article, if ever.

Chelsea was last seen eating a freaky fast, freaky fresh Jimmy John’s Gargantuan and couldn’t be bothered to even use a napkin, so we thought it best to not bother her for comment.


About Norbert Heck 20 Articles
There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand. You don't wanna get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel. So long, Dott.

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