Obama / Netflix To Produce Farrakhan Bio Pic


Barack Obama’s partnership with streaming media giant Netflix has led to quite a lot of fortune for the former President.  His “reboot” of 80’s program “Small Wonder”, re-titled “CrackerBot” is pulling in huge ratings.  Likewise popular is his full-length documentary about Target store’s public restroom policy, “Free to Pee Me.”  Now, with a multi-million dollar budget, the auteur is filming a biographical film about controversial figure Louis Farrakhan, entitled : “Black To the Future.”

The production, to feature a voice-over by Farrakhan himself, touches on a host of aspects of the black civil rights movement, the “Black Panther” organization, and will co-star Jeff Goldblum as President Ronald Reagan, whom Farrakhan says he had an illicit relationship with when the former actor’s mind had slipped and mistook him for Zsa Zsa Gabor.

In preparation to play the role of a young Al Sharpton, Jussie Smollett has been beating himself silly.

The production intends to “skip over” Farrakhan’s more controversial anti-Semitic remarks.  Obama himself explained why in an interview with Rotton Tomatoes :

“The trumpy teabagger crowd get really triggered about trying to assign anti-Sematism to people, which is strange, because nearly none of them are Jewish.  But let’s face it: most of these folks are too stupid to watch it anyway.  They either think Netflix is a kind of wheat cracker, or have televisions that run with the help of a kid with one eye riding a stationary bike.  They’re not our target audience.”

“Next, I’m going to make a new version of Fiddler on the Roof with Mel Gibson. You potatoes are just gonna plotz.”

The film is due to wrap in late July and will be available for streaming in September.

About Fallis Gunnington 171 Articles
Fallis Gunnington was born the son of a missle farmer and an anti-Carter activist. Shot with a hunting rifle twice a week to toughen him up, Gunnington then joined the Kiss Army, where he received his journalism degree as well as a debilitating knee injury rendering him unable to kneel before anything but Old Glory. He is currently single, since no female yet has the appropriately mighty hips.