Nancy Pelosi Has 150-Year-Old Sign Removed From House Chamber Entrance

Nancy Pelosi has done the unthinkable. Not only has she been caught with vodka at 11 AM in church, but she has also mothered no less than 4 criminal daughters, who have at least 14 names each, or between them, or both. Now this person, the leader of her party and 2nd behind Mike Pence for the Presidency, had a beautiful and historic sign removed from the chamber door of the House of Representatives.

The sign was a gift from Benedict Arnold to George Washington as a way to apologize for betraying the country to follow a narcissistic fascist like King George. Washington gave the gift to the National Archives and ordered Arnold executed. “I want him to look like a bloated egg yolk on a giant muffin covered in a buttery sauce so he dies engulfed in his own sins.” Thus the term “Eggs Benedict.”

Benedict Arnold may have died a horrible death for treason, but his sign lived on. In 1860, Republican Senator Abraham Lincoln found the sign in a storage closet while looking at the draft copies of the Magna Carta for research purposes. He fell in love with it and made a motion to have it installed over the Senate chamber door. The Democrats refused — because they hate God — so Lincoln handed it to Speaker of the House, Republican Art Tubolls, who happily placed it over the House chamber door.

It has hung there, with only the power of the Speaker able to remove it, ever since. Pelosi called the sign “antiquated, divisive, and unconstitutional in the halls of law.”

Several historical societies, as well as the Smithsonian Museum of our National Heritage, asked to have the sign — but Pelosi refused. “That was a dark time in this country when we turned our will and laws over to someone’s fictional God. We don’t need those kinds of distractions in our lives.”

These are the Democrats, folks. These are their heroes. God help us all.

About Flagg Eagleton 41 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.