GOP Proposes Arming The Unborn

Unborn but still American!

The three biggest hot button topics in America today have got to be the arming of our citizens, protecting our children , and abortion. All are about safety. Each requires dutiful lawmaking efforts and government oversight.

The Republican Party has always been known for efficient government. They reduce the size of government for cost effectiveness. They also have a strong belief in personal responsibility. So now the GOP has combined our most pressing issues with their own tried and true political philosophies to create “can’t fail”  legislation.

Ohio has passed a bill requiring the arming of fetuses in the womb with revolvers so that they may protect themselves from the evil abortionists. Ohio GOP staffer, Joe LaForm, explains why this is awesome :

“This is the best piece of legislation we’ve ever put forward! Not only does it get more guns out to the public, but it prevents abortions, and saves our children!

Fetuses will learn the value of the second amendment early.  They will save themselves from abortion performing doctors through the use of superior firepower. This cannot miss. Should the fetus feel under attack, he or she just need to fire away. The next baby killer will definitely think twice before trying to take that baby’s life!”

RPGs and flamethrowers were also considered but ultimately rejected as it was felt they might be difficult for the tiny cell packages in the womb to control.

In the Republican controlled state, the legislation is expected to pass easily.

The NRA backs the measure fully but there has been opposition from some OB/GYN‘s who complain that they may be unfairly targeted as they perform routine examinations or assist in the deliveries.

About Fired Writer 187 Articles
I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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