NY Governor Andrew Cuomo Under Investigation For Threats Against The President

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has been added to the National Threat Assessment Task Force’s persons of interest list. Cuomo, who has been destroying the lives of New Yorkers by making them stay indoors and out of work, was overheard recently making bold statements that the Task Force says “threatens the President directly.”

According to internal memos that haven’t been authenticated, Cuomo has — on at least four occasions — said that he’d like to hurt President Trump. Lead Investigator Art Tubolls explains:

“Cuomo has said repeatedly that had he ever run into Trump on the streets of New York that he would have ‘given him the beatdown that tubby little bitch deserves’ and that he would ‘break his nose and tear that mangy ferret pelt off his head and feed it to him with a Big Mac.’

“On another occasion, Cuomo said that he would do ‘everything in his power’ to make sure Trump isn’t re-elected, including ‘putting him in a sleeper hold until he passes out and peeing on his ugly red tie.’

“Just last week, Cuomo said he would stop at nothing until Trump was ‘out of the game and hopefully out of oxygen.’

“These aren’t the kinds of things we’re looking for in a public servant. if you can’t say anything nice, you shouldn’t say anything at all.”

The threats were passed on by the Secret Service as “silly stories nobody can corroborate” because just like every other federal agency, they’re still under Obama’s spell. The Justice Department will take the report from the Task Force into consideration and determine whether or not to file charges.

Not very bright, Mr. Governor. Maybe next time you decide to play in the big league, you should bring a big boy bat. President Trump isn’t afraid of you or anyone else.

About Flagg Eagleton 97 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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