Alabama Abortion Law Due To Population Declines

No longer a family friendly state

Last week, Alabama introduced some of the most restrictive abortion laws ever seen in this country in the past 40 years. The legislation affectively makes abortion illegal, under any circumstances, for any unborn baby six weeks old or older. It was presented as having been done for moral reasons, to fight for the lives of the unborn. In reality, the lawmakers motivations were much more practical.

The banjo market will be devastated should ‘Bama be lost.

A little background :  Alabama’s  population has traditionally been largely inbred.  Throughout the past couple of centuries, mothers have bedded their sons, uncles with nieces, fathers with daughters, first cousins together, and so forth.  The State’s motto was once “In Alabama, family matters above all”.  To outsiders, this suggested preserving the sanctity of the family unit through strong, loving marriages and the raising of happy children. Only Alabamans knew it referred to the their mother-wife sexual relationships.

Alabamans have been happy with this arrangement for a long time, and they still are, but inbreeding tends to cause defects in offspring – more and more over generations. Amongst the kin of that state, successive generations of family humping has finally led them to the point where their bodies will no longer allow for procreation. They can’t make any more babies in the deliverance clans.

The inbred account for 90% of Alabama’s population. And now they can’t breed.  And the other 10% of normal family units have been avoiding having babies through abortions and birth control because they didn’t want to raise kids around their “unnatural” neighbors.  But now they’ll have no choice.

Beauty queen Miss Alabama was crushed when she found she was born with 18 toes, 3 spleens, and no uterus with her hermaphroditism.y

Alabama’s new laws are all about forcing them to give birth in order to grow the population before it dies away completely. Most that we talked to, however, have other plans  :

”We are getting the hell out of This backwoods state. These people are sick. And stupid. And deformed. And mutated.”

Alabama’s future is bleak.

About Fired Writer 187 Articles
I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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