35 Percent of Americans Are Idiots: Study

A new study has found that approximately 35 percent of the American population, or about 74,216,154 people, are complete imbeciles. The study, conducted by an official poll in all 50 states, is being challenged in a few places, but it looks like the numbers are solid.

While there are differing degrees of idiocy, the people the study found to be of less-than-average intelligence, with little to no common sense, tend to be louder and more outspoken than their neighbors and coworkers, making it seem as though they actually have a majority.

People in the “idiot” category are not necessarily less educated but are more likely to tell you why the things they learned in their schoolin’ were wrong. They typically rely on emotion as a driving force for their alternative facts and care very little for things like science, history, and the truth. Fantasy is far easier for idiots to accept.

It’s not difficult to find the idiots in your neighborhood. If they don’t have some kind of flag or banner declaring their silliness to the world, you can typically find them by rolling down your window on a Saturday afternoon and yelling “TRUMP 2020!!!!!” Anyone who shouts “hell yeah,” or “Yeehaw” is an idiot.

God Bless America.

About Flagg Eagleton-Patriot 148 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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