16000 Patriots Volunteer To Guard Border

The boarder is now secure.

The United Constitutional Militia had been working side-by-side with ICE and US Customs and Border Control  for months, arresting and detaining illegal immigrants from Mexico until they could be deported by the government. They worked day and night tirelessly and without pay. Why, you ask? To keep our country from harm at the hands of foreign invaders.

But the US government saw things differently. Yesterday, the militia group saw its operations come to an end. Their leader was arrested and the remaining troops dissolved.

So all would appear to be lost, right? Wrong. Because this is America where freedom rules and love of country explodes like an RPG in the hearts of the citizens.  Since the dissolution of the United Constitutional Militia, no fewer than 16000 loyal, patriotic Americans heard their country calling and have stepped up to replace the militia’s fallen ranks. There are so many, in fact, that they can virtually link arms to span the entire Mexican border.

One old man volunteer shook his fist most vigorously. America is a safer place with him in it.

One of the volunteers, Hugh Janus, said that he came all the way from New York City to step up and protect his home.

“This is no joke. All these illegals come over here and steal jobs from decent Americans. You know what I mean? They come over here, sit on welfare, don’t work, steal our jobs,  and we have to pay for them!   Well I won’t take it anymore! No longer will I support job stealing, lazy, welfare bums!  I’m here to take a stand for common sense!”

Many volunteers quit their jobs and began collecting welfare to get by so they could keep out lazy, job stealing Mexicans.

At the time of the writing of the story, neither the government nor the border patrol were available for comment so it is unclear if further action against them will be taken. One thing is clear though – Because of these brave men and women our country is safer for at least one more day.

About Fired Writer 187 Articles
I refused to evolve and wrote fake news for cash, so I got fired.

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